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#1
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When is the right time?
Hi all,
I have a 15 and half year old English Cocker Spaniel who is now getting old and tired. During her life she has had little in the way of health problems but over the last two years in particular has slowed down to a point where she spends the majority of her time sleeping and only wanders as far as the back garden. She now poo's and wee's in the house which we have learned to cope with (Vax is very useful!) and will walk around in circles and not be so interested in contact and been with us. Due to the leaking if is often necessary to bath her once a day to avoid her smelling too much, we intend to replace all the carpet once she is no longer with us. We can no longer leave her with friends/neighbors for the day and it would now be difficult for us to take her away in the caravan so this year we have made no plans to go anywhere as we need to stay with her. I will be devastated when she finally goes, she is my first and only dog and has been a real friend to me and I will find it so difficult if I have to make a decision at some point to have her put down. I guess what I am asking here is am I doing the right thing at the moment, I do not know what her quality of life is and I suppose I just want to think its ok and let things carry on for now. It's easy for me to get emotional over this and a number of years ago I found this poem which I have kept the link to that brings tears to my eyes every time I look at it http://www.la-spca.org/pet_loss/comfort/last_battle.htm I happen to be a 43 year old bloke with a wife and two young children but when my dog is finally put to rest it is going to be very difficult. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Paul |
#2
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When is the right time?
"Paul" wrote in message ... Hi all, I have a 15 and half year old English Cocker Spaniel who is now getting old and tired. During her life she has had little in the way of health problems but over the last two years in particular has slowed down to a point where she spends the majority of her time sleeping and only wanders as far as the back garden. She now poo's and wee's in the house which we have learned to cope with (Vax is very useful!) and will walk around in circles and not be so interested in contact and been with us. Due to the leaking if is often necessary to bath her once a day to avoid her smelling too much, we intend to replace all the carpet once she is no longer with us. We can no longer leave her with friends/neighbors for the day and it would now be difficult for us to take her away in the caravan so this year we have made no plans to go anywhere as we need to stay with her. I will be devastated when she finally goes, she is my first and only dog and has been a real friend to me and I will find it so difficult if I have to make a decision at some point to have her put down. I guess what I am asking here is am I doing the right thing at the moment, I do not know what her quality of life is and I suppose I just want to think its ok and let things carry on for now. It's easy for me to get emotional over this and a number of years ago I found this poem which I have kept the link to that brings tears to my eyes every time I look at it http://www.la-spca.org/pet_loss/comfort/last_battle.htm I happen to be a 43 year old bloke with a wife and two young children but when my dog is finally put to rest it is going to be very difficult. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Paul =========== The reason she could be walking around in circles is that she can't see. I had a 16 year old poodle that went blind with cataracts and walked around in circles. |
#3
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When is the right time?
I guess what I am asking here is am I doing the right thing at the moment,
I do not know what her quality of life is and I suppose I just want to think its ok and let things carry on for now. There are two ways to think about this. First, count the good days and bad days. When there are more bad days than good days it's time to start thinking about ending her life peacefully. The second, and more vague, is that one day you'll know inside when the time is right. Don't second guess yourself and please know that ending a pet's suffering by euthanasia is the kindest act of love you can give her. |
#4
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When is the right time?
"Sharon Too" wrote in message ... I guess what I am asking here is am I doing the right thing at the moment, I do not know what her quality of life is and I suppose I just want to think its ok and let things carry on for now. There are two ways to think about this. First, count the good days and bad days. When there are more bad days than good days it's time to start thinking about ending her life peacefully. The second, and more vague, is that one day you'll know inside when the time is right. Don't second guess yourself and please know that ending a pet's suffering by euthanasia is the kindest act of love you can give her. ........It's tough to separate out having to let go from the quality of life issue. Has she been into the vet in a while? I'd discuss euthanasia with the vet, so whenever you're ready to let her go, you'll know how it goes and what to expect. Take your pup along too for an exam. Sometimes there ARE things that can be fixed or dealt with medically that can make her more comfortable. Does she eat well? Does she look miserable or as if she's not having a good time or seems confused all the time? These are questions you'll have to consider. Really, your pup will never be the youngster she once was, and to my way of thinking if she's not in pain, there's nothing wrong with snoozing in the garden in the twilight of her life. We've all been there. It's the hardest decision in the world to make. It's tough to let go of old friends. Hug your pup every day and thank her for sharing her life with you. buglady take out the dog before replying |
#5
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When is the right time?
I don't look forward to the day when I must put down one of my pets. I
would base my decision on the following: would I, in it's condition, rather be alive or dead? I think I would prefer to live even in poor health, but I'm in good health so my point of view is skewed. With that said, if you think she is in lots of pain and you want to stop her suffering, then I can see putting her down while you hold in your arms one last time and the family says good bye. If she doesn't seem to be in pain, has brought so much happiness to you and now just sleeps a lot and piddles on the carpet, I would keep around as long as possible. I think your children seeing you care for a long time companion who happens to pee on the carpet through no fault of her own is a good object leason. "Paul" wrote in message ... Hi all, I have a 15 and half year old English Cocker Spaniel who is now getting old and tired. During her life she has had little in the way of health problems but over the last two years in particular has slowed down to a point where she spends the majority of her time sleeping and only wanders as far as the back garden. She now poo's and wee's in the house which we have learned to cope with (Vax is very useful!) and will walk around in circles and not be so interested in contact and been with us. Due to the leaking if is often necessary to bath her once a day to avoid her smelling too much, we intend to replace all the carpet once she is no longer with us. We can no longer leave her with friends/neighbors for the day and it would now be difficult for us to take her away in the caravan so this year we have made no plans to go anywhere as we need to stay with her. I will be devastated when she finally goes, she is my first and only dog and has been a real friend to me and I will find it so difficult if I have to make a decision at some point to have her put down. I guess what I am asking here is am I doing the right thing at the moment, I do not know what her quality of life is and I suppose I just want to think its ok and let things carry on for now. It's easy for me to get emotional over this and a number of years ago I found this poem which I have kept the link to that brings tears to my eyes every time I look at it http://www.la-spca.org/pet_loss/comfort/last_battle.htm I happen to be a 43 year old bloke with a wife and two young children but when my dog is finally put to rest it is going to be very difficult. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Paul |
#6
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When is the right time?
Paul wrote:
Hi all, I have a 15 and half year old English Cocker Spaniel who is now getting old and tired. During her life she has had little in the way of health problems but over the last two years in particular has slowed down to a point where she spends the majority of her time sleeping and only wanders as far as the back garden. She now poo's and wee's in the house which we have learned to cope with (Vax is very useful!) and will walk around in circles and not be so interested in contact and been with us. Due to the leaking if is often necessary to bath her once a day to avoid her smelling too much, we intend to replace all the carpet once she is no longer with us. We can no longer leave her with friends/neighbors for the day and it would now be difficult for us to take her away in the caravan so this year we have made no plans to go anywhere as we need to stay with her. I will be devastated when she finally goes, she is my first and only dog and has been a real friend to me and I will find it so difficult if I have to make a decision at some point to have her put down. I guess what I am asking here is am I doing the right thing at the moment, I do not know what her quality of life is and I suppose I just want to think its ok and let things carry on for now. It's easy for me to get emotional over this and a number of years ago I found this poem which I have kept the link to that brings tears to my eyes every time I look at it http://www.la-spca.org/pet_loss/comfort/last_battle.htm I happen to be a 43 year old bloke with a wife and two young children but when my dog is finally put to rest it is going to be very difficult. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Trust yourself. Your are her oldest and best friend. Nobody knows her like you do and nobody loves her more and if you are not sure it's time yet, then it's not time yet. But one morning in the not-so-distant future you'll look at her and know that it *is* time. Given that this is pretty much inevitable (in all my 44 years I've never had a pet pass quietly in his/her sleep) it helps to make a plan. Will your vet make housecalls? If not and your dog is upset by car rides or vet visits maybe he can give you some valium or something to give her to ease her anxiety. Can you take a vacation day on short notice, or have your secretary reschedule your appointments for the day? Do you want the kids there? What will you tell them, and when? Will you bring her home for burial or have her cremated? It's hard and it's horrible but giving an easy ending is the payback we owe our pets for the grace they bestow upon our lives and souls. |
#7
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When is the right time?
On May 8, 5:28 pm, "Paul" wrote:
Hi all, I have a 15 and half year old English Cocker Spaniel who is now getting old and tired. During her life she has had little in the way of health problems but over the last two years in particular has slowed down to a point where she spends the majority of her time sleeping and only wanders as far as the back garden. She now poo's and wee's in the house which we have learned to cope with (Vax is very useful!) and will walk around in circles and not be so interested in contact and been with us. Due to the leaking if is often necessary to bath her once a day to avoid her smelling too much, we intend to replace all the carpet once she is no longer with us. We can no longer leave her with friends/neighbors for the day and it would now be difficult for us to take her away in the caravan so this year we have made no plans to go anywhere as we need to stay with her. I will be devastated when she finally goes, she is my first and only dog and has been a real friend to me and I will find it so difficult if I have to make a decision at some point to have her put down. I guess what I am asking here is am I doing the right thing at the moment, I do not know what her quality of life is and I suppose I just want to think its ok and let things carry on for now. It's easy for me to get emotional over this and a number of years ago I found this poem which I have kept the link to that brings tears to my eyes every time I look at ithttp://www.la-spca.org/pet_loss/comfort/last_battle.htm I happen to be a 43 year old bloke with a wife and two young children but when my dog is finally put to rest it is going to be very difficult. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Paul All of us who are pet lovers have to go through this at some point. It's simpler, not easy, but simpler, when the pet is really ill, and the illness can't be treated or the treatment would merely prolong misery. It's harder to know whether you're doing the right thing when they're just old, and declining from age. First, I'd say get the dog to the vet for a going-over, if you haven't. Sometimes there are things that can be done to improve quality of life. (Maybe you already have done this.) And then, or if you already have, pay attention to how she acts. Is she _enjoying_ sleeping in the garden? She may well be! She's an elderly lady, and being able to lie dreaming in the sun may be a real pleasure to her. Is she miserable? Confused and distressed? Or merely just not quite as with-it as she was when she was younger? My great-aunt had a bichon that was seventeen years old, blind, and deaf--and still enjoyed going out in the garden, or on the screen porch, and lying in the sun, or by the fireplace in the winter, and sitting in my g-a's lap. And she enjoyed her meals! Despite outrage outcry from some of her nieces and nephews ("She's blind! She's deaf!"), my g-a refused to have her put down--until the arthritis got really bad, and the little dog could no longer get around without being in severe pain. THAT robbed her of quality of life, and that's when my great-aunt had her put to sleep, because she was no longer enjoying her life. What I'm saying is, you''re her best friend, you know her best, and if you don't let yourself get distracted by what other people say, you'll know when it's time, and she's not enjoying her life anymore. Until then, don't be moved by anyone who says "but you need to!" and when the time comes, don't be moved by anyone who says, "how can you?!" Lis |
#8
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When is the right time?
"Lis" wrote in message
ups.com... Until then, don't be moved by anyone who says "but you need to!" and when the time comes, don't be moved by anyone who says, "how can you?!" And then afterwards, don't beat yourself up with "what ifs" and "whys". It's very difficult not to do that especially when you're dealing with deteriorating health and not a catastophic event. Why today and why not yesterday? What if tomorrow would have been a little better? Eventually, you will remember that it was the total of the days and not a specific event that made your decision. I always try to remember that dogs live in the present. Your dog doesn't know that tomorrow may be better or worse. He only knows right now. You, however, know about yesterday and tomorrow. When it's time, your heart will know. And there's no wrong answer to the questions. Someone else in your exact position might make a slightly different choice. Doesn't matter. It's your heart and your choice to live with. Judy |
#9
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When is the right time?
Hi Paul,
I would have a chat with your vet and see what can be done. There are things like Propalyn for leakage which might help. You can get pads for dogs to wear . Best wishes Alison http://catinfolinks.mysite.wanadoo-members.co.uk/ http://doginfolinks.mysite.wanadoo-members.co.uk/ http://petinfolinks.mysite.orange.co.uk "Paul" wrote in message ... Hi all, I have a 15 and half year old English Cocker Spaniel who is now getting old and tired. During her life she has had little in the way of health problems but over the last two years in particular has slowed down to a point where she spends the majority of her time sleeping and only wanders as far as the back garden. She now poo's and wee's in the house which we have learned to cope with (Vax is very useful!) and will walk around in circles and not be so interested in contact and been with us. Due to the leaking if is often necessary to bath her once a day to avoid her smelling too much, we intend to replace all the carpet once she is no longer with us. We can no longer leave her with friends/neighbors for the day and it would now be difficult for us to take her away in the caravan so this year we have made no plans to go anywhere as we need to stay with her. I will be devastated when she finally goes, she is my first and only dog and has been a real friend to me and I will find it so difficult if I have to make a decision at some point to have her put down. I guess what I am asking here is am I doing the right thing at the moment, I do not know what her quality of life is and I suppose I just want to think its ok and let things carry on for now. It's easy for me to get emotional over this and a number of years ago I found this poem which I have kept the link to that brings tears to my eyes every time I look at it http://www.la-spca.org/pet_loss/comfort/last_battle.htm I happen to be a 43 year old bloke with a wife and two young children but when my dog is finally put to rest it is going to be very difficult. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Paul |
#10
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When is the right time?
Quality of life is when what you used to enjoy is no longer an option. Long
walks to no walks , playing ball to no interest, cuddling to aloofness. Basically hurts too much to do what used to be fun. If your dog did these things and slowly stopped with age than that's normal. As for the potty in the house you may need to let her out more often and there is always the puppy diapers, they help some. You can clip her bottom hair so that the waste doesn't stick and you change her bottom instead of clean the carpet. My parents dog made it to 22 years of age and he staid house broken up to his last day. "Paul" wrote in message ... Hi all, I have a 15 and half year old English Cocker Spaniel who is now getting old and tired. During her life she has had little in the way of health problems but over the last two years in particular has slowed down to a point where she spends the majority of her time sleeping and only wanders as far as the back garden. She now poo's and wee's in the house which we have learned to cope with (Vax is very useful!) and will walk around in circles and not be so interested in contact and been with us. Due to the leaking if is often necessary to bath her once a day to avoid her smelling too much, we intend to replace all the carpet once she is no longer with us. We can no longer leave her with friends/neighbors for the day and it would now be difficult for us to take her away in the caravan so this year we have made no plans to go anywhere as we need to stay with her. I will be devastated when she finally goes, she is my first and only dog and has been a real friend to me and I will find it so difficult if I have to make a decision at some point to have her put down. I guess what I am asking here is am I doing the right thing at the moment, I do not know what her quality of life is and I suppose I just want to think its ok and let things carry on for now. It's easy for me to get emotional over this and a number of years ago I found this poem which I have kept the link to that brings tears to my eyes every time I look at it http://www.la-spca.org/pet_loss/comfort/last_battle.htm I happen to be a 43 year old bloke with a wife and two young children but when my dog is finally put to rest it is going to be very difficult. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Paul |
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