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When is the right time?



 
 
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  #1  
Old May 8th 07, 10:28 PM posted to alt.pets.dogs,rec.pets.dogs.health
Paul[_3_]
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 4
Default When is the right time?

Hi all,

I have a 15 and half year old English Cocker Spaniel who is now getting old
and tired. During her life she has had little in the way of health problems
but over the last two years in particular has slowed down to a point where
she spends the majority of her time sleeping and only wanders as far as the
back garden. She now poo's and wee's in the house which we have learned to
cope with (Vax is very useful!) and will walk around in circles and not be
so interested in contact and been with us. Due to the leaking if is often
necessary to bath her once a day to avoid her smelling too much, we intend
to replace all the carpet once she is no longer with us.

We can no longer leave her with friends/neighbors for the day and it would
now be difficult for us to take her away in the caravan so this year we have
made no plans to go anywhere as we need to stay with her.

I will be devastated when she finally goes, she is my first and only dog and
has been a real friend to me and I will find it so difficult if I have to
make a decision at some point to have her put down.

I guess what I am asking here is am I doing the right thing at the moment, I
do not know what her quality of life is and I suppose I just want to think
its ok and let things carry on for now. It's easy for me to get emotional
over this and a number of years ago I found this poem which I have kept the
link to that brings tears to my eyes every time I look at it
http://www.la-spca.org/pet_loss/comfort/last_battle.htm

I happen to be a 43 year old bloke with a wife and two young children but
when my dog is finally put to rest it is going to be very difficult.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Paul


  #2  
Old May 8th 07, 11:47 PM posted to alt.pets.dogs,rec.pets.dogs.health
pfoley
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 1,285
Default When is the right time?


"Paul" wrote in message
...
Hi all,

I have a 15 and half year old English Cocker Spaniel who is now getting

old
and tired. During her life she has had little in the way of health

problems
but over the last two years in particular has slowed down to a point where
she spends the majority of her time sleeping and only wanders as far as

the
back garden. She now poo's and wee's in the house which we have learned to
cope with (Vax is very useful!) and will walk around in circles and not be
so interested in contact and been with us. Due to the leaking if is often
necessary to bath her once a day to avoid her smelling too much, we intend
to replace all the carpet once she is no longer with us.

We can no longer leave her with friends/neighbors for the day and it would
now be difficult for us to take her away in the caravan so this year we

have
made no plans to go anywhere as we need to stay with her.

I will be devastated when she finally goes, she is my first and only dog

and
has been a real friend to me and I will find it so difficult if I have to
make a decision at some point to have her put down.

I guess what I am asking here is am I doing the right thing at the moment,

I
do not know what her quality of life is and I suppose I just want to think
its ok and let things carry on for now. It's easy for me to get emotional
over this and a number of years ago I found this poem which I have kept

the
link to that brings tears to my eyes every time I look at it
http://www.la-spca.org/pet_loss/comfort/last_battle.htm

I happen to be a 43 year old bloke with a wife and two young children but
when my dog is finally put to rest it is going to be very difficult.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Paul

===========
The reason she could be walking around in circles is that she can't see. I
had a 16 year old poodle that went blind with cataracts and walked around in
circles.





  #3  
Old May 9th 07, 12:07 AM posted to alt.pets.dogs,rec.pets.dogs.health
Sharon Too
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 664
Default When is the right time?

I guess what I am asking here is am I doing the right thing at the moment,
I do not know what her quality of life is and I suppose I just want to
think its ok and let things carry on for now.


There are two ways to think about this. First, count the good days and bad
days. When there are more bad days than good days it's time to start
thinking about ending her life peacefully.

The second, and more vague, is that one day you'll know inside when the time
is right. Don't second guess yourself and please know that ending a pet's
suffering by euthanasia is the kindest act of love you can give her.


  #4  
Old May 9th 07, 12:14 AM posted to rec.pets.dogs.health
buglady
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 863
Default When is the right time?


"Sharon Too" wrote in message
...
I guess what I am asking here is am I doing the right thing at the

moment,
I do not know what her quality of life is and I suppose I just want to
think its ok and let things carry on for now.


There are two ways to think about this. First, count the good days and bad
days. When there are more bad days than good days it's time to start
thinking about ending her life peacefully.

The second, and more vague, is that one day you'll know inside when the

time
is right. Don't second guess yourself and please know that ending a pet's
suffering by euthanasia is the kindest act of love you can give her.


........It's tough to separate out having to let go from the quality of life
issue. Has she been into the vet in a while? I'd discuss euthanasia with
the vet, so whenever you're ready to let her go, you'll know how it goes and
what to expect. Take your pup along too for an exam. Sometimes there ARE
things that can be fixed or dealt with medically that can make her more
comfortable. Does she eat well? Does she look miserable or as if she's not
having a good time or seems confused all the time? These are questions
you'll have to consider. Really, your pup will never be the youngster she
once was, and to my way of thinking if she's not in pain, there's nothing
wrong with snoozing in the garden in the twilight of her life. We've all
been there. It's the hardest decision in the world to make. It's tough to
let go of old friends.

Hug your pup every day and thank her for sharing her life with you.

buglady
take out the dog before replying


  #5  
Old May 9th 07, 02:29 AM posted to alt.pets.dogs,rec.pets.dogs.health
Ed H.
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 3
Default When is the right time?

I don't look forward to the day when I must put down one of my pets. I
would base my decision on the following: would I, in it's condition, rather
be alive or dead? I think I would prefer to live even in poor health, but
I'm in good health so my point of view is skewed.

With that said, if you think she is in lots of pain and you want to stop her
suffering, then I can see putting her down while you hold in your arms one
last time and the family says good bye. If she doesn't seem to be in pain,
has brought so much happiness to you and now just sleeps a lot and piddles
on the carpet, I would keep around as long as possible. I think your
children seeing you care for a long time companion who happens to pee on the
carpet through no fault of her own is a good object leason.

"Paul" wrote in message
...
Hi all,

I have a 15 and half year old English Cocker Spaniel who is now getting
old and tired. During her life she has had little in the way of health
problems but over the last two years in particular has slowed down to a
point where she spends the majority of her time sleeping and only wanders
as far as the back garden. She now poo's and wee's in the house which we
have learned to cope with (Vax is very useful!) and will walk around in
circles and not be so interested in contact and been with us. Due to the
leaking if is often necessary to bath her once a day to avoid her smelling
too much, we intend to replace all the carpet once she is no longer with
us.

We can no longer leave her with friends/neighbors for the day and it would
now be difficult for us to take her away in the caravan so this year we
have made no plans to go anywhere as we need to stay with her.

I will be devastated when she finally goes, she is my first and only dog
and has been a real friend to me and I will find it so difficult if I have
to make a decision at some point to have her put down.

I guess what I am asking here is am I doing the right thing at the moment,
I do not know what her quality of life is and I suppose I just want to
think its ok and let things carry on for now. It's easy for me to get
emotional over this and a number of years ago I found this poem which I
have kept the link to that brings tears to my eyes every time I look at it
http://www.la-spca.org/pet_loss/comfort/last_battle.htm

I happen to be a 43 year old bloke with a wife and two young children but
when my dog is finally put to rest it is going to be very difficult.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Paul




  #6  
Old May 9th 07, 02:56 AM posted to alt.pets.dogs,rec.pets.dogs.health
Kathleen
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 942
Default When is the right time?

Paul wrote:

Hi all,

I have a 15 and half year old English Cocker Spaniel who is now getting
old and tired. During her life she has had little in the way of health
problems but over the last two years in particular has slowed down to a
point where she spends the majority of her time sleeping and only
wanders as far as the back garden. She now poo's and wee's in the house
which we have learned to cope with (Vax is very useful!) and will walk
around in circles and not be so interested in contact and been with us.
Due to the leaking if is often necessary to bath her once a day to avoid
her smelling too much, we intend to replace all the carpet once she is
no longer with us.

We can no longer leave her with friends/neighbors for the day and it
would now be difficult for us to take her away in the caravan so this
year we have made no plans to go anywhere as we need to stay with her.

I will be devastated when she finally goes, she is my first and only dog
and has been a real friend to me and I will find it so difficult if I
have to make a decision at some point to have her put down.

I guess what I am asking here is am I doing the right thing at the
moment, I do not know what her quality of life is and I suppose I just
want to think its ok and let things carry on for now. It's easy for me
to get emotional over this and a number of years ago I found this poem
which I have kept the link to that brings tears to my eyes every time I
look at it http://www.la-spca.org/pet_loss/comfort/last_battle.htm

I happen to be a 43 year old bloke with a wife and two young children
but when my dog is finally put to rest it is going to be very difficult.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.


Trust yourself. Your are her oldest and best friend. Nobody knows her
like you do and nobody loves her more and if you are not sure it's time
yet, then it's not time yet. But one morning in the not-so-distant
future you'll look at her and know that it *is* time.

Given that this is pretty much inevitable (in all my 44 years I've never
had a pet pass quietly in his/her sleep) it helps to make a plan.

Will your vet make housecalls? If not and your dog is upset by car
rides or vet visits maybe he can give you some valium or something to
give her to ease her anxiety.

Can you take a vacation day on short notice, or have your secretary
reschedule your appointments for the day?

Do you want the kids there? What will you tell them, and when?

Will you bring her home for burial or have her cremated?

It's hard and it's horrible but giving an easy ending is the payback we
owe our pets for the grace they bestow upon our lives and souls.

  #7  
Old May 9th 07, 03:38 PM posted to alt.pets.dogs,rec.pets.dogs.health
Lis
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 40
Default When is the right time?

On May 8, 5:28 pm, "Paul" wrote:
Hi all,

I have a 15 and half year old English Cocker Spaniel who is now getting old
and tired. During her life she has had little in the way of health problems
but over the last two years in particular has slowed down to a point where
she spends the majority of her time sleeping and only wanders as far as the
back garden. She now poo's and wee's in the house which we have learned to
cope with (Vax is very useful!) and will walk around in circles and not be
so interested in contact and been with us. Due to the leaking if is often
necessary to bath her once a day to avoid her smelling too much, we intend
to replace all the carpet once she is no longer with us.

We can no longer leave her with friends/neighbors for the day and it would
now be difficult for us to take her away in the caravan so this year we have
made no plans to go anywhere as we need to stay with her.

I will be devastated when she finally goes, she is my first and only dog and
has been a real friend to me and I will find it so difficult if I have to
make a decision at some point to have her put down.

I guess what I am asking here is am I doing the right thing at the moment, I
do not know what her quality of life is and I suppose I just want to think
its ok and let things carry on for now. It's easy for me to get emotional
over this and a number of years ago I found this poem which I have kept the
link to that brings tears to my eyes every time I look at ithttp://www.la-spca.org/pet_loss/comfort/last_battle.htm

I happen to be a 43 year old bloke with a wife and two young children but
when my dog is finally put to rest it is going to be very difficult.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Paul


All of us who are pet lovers have to go through this at some point.
It's simpler, not easy, but simpler, when the pet is really ill, and
the illness can't be treated or the treatment would merely prolong
misery. It's harder to know whether you're doing the right thing when
they're just old, and declining from age.

First, I'd say get the dog to the vet for a going-over, if you
haven't. Sometimes there are things that can be done to improve
quality of life. (Maybe you already have done this.) And then, or if
you already have, pay attention to how she acts. Is she _enjoying_
sleeping in the garden? She may well be! She's an elderly lady, and
being able to lie dreaming in the sun may be a real pleasure to her.
Is she miserable? Confused and distressed? Or merely just not quite as
with-it as she was when she was younger?

My great-aunt had a bichon that was seventeen years old, blind, and
deaf--and still enjoyed going out in the garden, or on the screen
porch, and lying in the sun, or by the fireplace in the winter, and
sitting in my g-a's lap. And she enjoyed her meals! Despite outrage
outcry from some of her nieces and nephews ("She's blind! She's
deaf!"), my g-a refused to have her put down--until the arthritis got
really bad, and the little dog could no longer get around without
being in severe pain. THAT robbed her of quality of life, and that's
when my great-aunt had her put to sleep, because she was no longer
enjoying her life.

What I'm saying is, you''re her best friend, you know her best, and if
you don't let yourself get distracted by what other people say, you'll
know when it's time, and she's not enjoying her life anymore. Until
then, don't be moved by anyone who says "but you need to!" and when
the time comes, don't be moved by anyone who says, "how can you?!"

Lis

  #8  
Old May 9th 07, 04:39 PM posted to alt.pets.dogs,rec.pets.dogs.health
Judy
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 1,411
Default When is the right time?

"Lis" wrote in message
ups.com...
Until
then, don't be moved by anyone who says "but you need to!" and when
the time comes, don't be moved by anyone who says, "how can you?!"


And then afterwards, don't beat yourself up with "what ifs" and "whys".

It's very difficult not to do that especially when you're dealing with
deteriorating health and not a catastophic event. Why today and why not
yesterday? What if tomorrow would have been a little better? Eventually,
you will remember that it was the total of the days and not a specific event
that made your decision.

I always try to remember that dogs live in the present. Your dog doesn't
know that tomorrow may be better or worse. He only knows right now. You,
however, know about yesterday and tomorrow.

When it's time, your heart will know. And there's no wrong answer to the
questions. Someone else in your exact position might make a slightly
different choice. Doesn't matter. It's your heart and your choice to live
with.

Judy


  #9  
Old May 10th 07, 11:56 AM posted to alt.pets.dogs,rec.pets.dogs.health
Alison
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 26
Default When is the right time?

Hi Paul,
I would have a chat with your vet and see what can be done. There are
things like Propalyn for leakage which might help. You can get pads for
dogs to wear .
Best wishes

Alison
http://catinfolinks.mysite.wanadoo-members.co.uk/
http://doginfolinks.mysite.wanadoo-members.co.uk/
http://petinfolinks.mysite.orange.co.uk


"Paul" wrote in message
...
Hi all,

I have a 15 and half year old English Cocker Spaniel who is now getting
old and tired. During her life she has had little in the way of health
problems but over the last two years in particular has slowed down to a
point where she spends the majority of her time sleeping and only wanders
as far as the back garden. She now poo's and wee's in the house which we
have learned to cope with (Vax is very useful!) and will walk around in
circles and not be so interested in contact and been with us. Due to the
leaking if is often necessary to bath her once a day to avoid her
smelling too much, we intend to replace all the carpet once she is no
longer with us.

We can no longer leave her with friends/neighbors for the day and it
would now be difficult for us to take her away in the caravan so this
year we have made no plans to go anywhere as we need to stay with her.

I will be devastated when she finally goes, she is my first and only dog
and has been a real friend to me and I will find it so difficult if I
have to make a decision at some point to have her put down.

I guess what I am asking here is am I doing the right thing at the
moment, I do not know what her quality of life is and I suppose I just
want to think its ok and let things carry on for now. It's easy for me to
get emotional over this and a number of years ago I found this poem which
I have kept the link to that brings tears to my eyes every time I look at
it http://www.la-spca.org/pet_loss/comfort/last_battle.htm

I happen to be a 43 year old bloke with a wife and two young children but
when my dog is finally put to rest it is going to be very difficult.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Paul




  #10  
Old May 15th 07, 02:18 PM posted to alt.pets.dogs,rec.pets.dogs.health
Shadow Walker
external usenet poster
 
Posts: 131
Default When is the right time?

Quality of life is when what you used to enjoy is no longer an option. Long
walks to no walks , playing ball to no interest, cuddling to aloofness.
Basically hurts too much to do what used to be fun. If your dog did these
things and slowly stopped with age than that's normal. As for the potty in
the house you may need to let her out more often and there is always the
puppy diapers, they help some. You can clip her bottom hair so that the
waste doesn't stick and you change her bottom instead of clean the carpet.
My parents dog made it to 22 years of age and he staid house broken up to
his last day.


"Paul" wrote in message
...
Hi all,

I have a 15 and half year old English Cocker Spaniel who is now getting
old and tired. During her life she has had little in the way of health
problems but over the last two years in particular has slowed down to a
point where she spends the majority of her time sleeping and only wanders
as far as the back garden. She now poo's and wee's in the house which we
have learned to cope with (Vax is very useful!) and will walk around in
circles and not be so interested in contact and been with us. Due to the
leaking if is often necessary to bath her once a day to avoid her smelling
too much, we intend to replace all the carpet once she is no longer with
us.

We can no longer leave her with friends/neighbors for the day and it would
now be difficult for us to take her away in the caravan so this year we
have made no plans to go anywhere as we need to stay with her.

I will be devastated when she finally goes, she is my first and only dog
and has been a real friend to me and I will find it so difficult if I have
to make a decision at some point to have her put down.

I guess what I am asking here is am I doing the right thing at the moment,
I do not know what her quality of life is and I suppose I just want to
think its ok and let things carry on for now. It's easy for me to get
emotional over this and a number of years ago I found this poem which I
have kept the link to that brings tears to my eyes every time I look at it
http://www.la-spca.org/pet_loss/comfort/last_battle.htm

I happen to be a 43 year old bloke with a wife and two young children but
when my dog is finally put to rest it is going to be very difficult.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Paul




 




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