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Poor Duckie...
Rusty murdered his teddy bear in it's sleep a few days ago, so I thought I'd
get him a new squeaky plush toy at Meijer last night. I picked out a very colorful neon ornage and yellow duck. I presented it to him when we got home. He was impressed. Two minutes later "rrrrriiiiiiippppp." Duckie had lost a wing. I picked him up, and sewed the hole back together (but not the wing back on--I saw that one coming.) Rusty helped as much as possible by stealing the spool of thread and scissors, several times each. (The cat was attempting to kidnap the needle-threader, so I couldn't provide my full attention.) I tossed Duckie back on the floor. "Squeak-a-squeak-a-squeak-a-RRRRRIIIIPPPP..." two minutes later. Duckie had been disembowled. I picked up the stuffing and replaced it, and sewed his tummy shut. I considered that it might be best to amputate Duckie's other wing at this time, to save myself when he inevitably tore that off as well. The boyfriend, at this point, named Duckie "Bob." I tossed Duckie back to the Rusty. Not thirty seconds later, there was ANOTHER appendage. Bob the Handicapped Duck was now missing both wings and a foot. I repaired that hole. And returned the duck to the dog. Maybe 20 seconds later, Bob needed another hole repaired when he became the Wingless Legless Wonder Duck. I decided that I was tired of repairing Bob and put him on top of the hamster cage until I didn't care if he died. After all, it had only been 20 minutes since I'd BOUGHT him, let alone walked through the door. So I get home from dropping Will off at work, putz around a little bit, give Bob the Wingless Legless Wonder Duck back to Rusty. Not two minutes later, and Rusty's goal has been achieved. He's prancing around the looks-like-it-snowed-from-Duck-Guts Living Room with the squeaky going "squeak-a-squeak-a-squeak-a-" So now I need to vacuum and Bob the Wingless Legless Wonder Duck will be buried in the Dumpster. (Along with the hamster that I found dead this morning. I think she got sick of the "squeak-a-squeak-a-". In all seriousness, she was better than 2 years old and with her previous owner, has had a litter a month until I got her.) -- Emily Carroll Dealing 80s Toys - Rainbow Brite - My Little Pony - More Website: www.geocities.com/diamonds_in_her_eyes CPG: www.geocities.com/cyberpetgame --- Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). Version: 6.0.532 / Virus Database: 326 - Release Date: 10/27/2003 |
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